Cooking with Corpses

 

📕 COOKING WITH CORPSES: The Only Cookbook That Might Get You Exorcised.

👩‍🍳 You want cute kitchen inspo? Go to Pinterest.

You want to scream while deep-frying mozzarella fingers shaped like Freddy Krueger’s glove?

You’re home, sweetie.

Inside these cursed, sauce-drenched pages:

• 🍟 Fried Freddy Fingers: Mozzarella sticks that kill dreams and arteries.
• 🥔 Shining Taters: Double-baked potatoes that whisper “Come bake with us… forever.”
• 🔥 Texas Chainsauce Massacre: BBQ sauce that slaps harder than Leatherface with a brisket.
• 🥣 Split Pea Possession Soup: Just don’t look it in the eyes.
• 🌽 Night of the Comet Crunch: The apocalypse never tasted so neon.

Every recipe includes:

💀 Kill Count

📣 Scream Time

☠️ Survivability Rating (spoiler: most of you won’t make it)

WARNING:

Reading this cookbook aloud may summon a Kandarian demon, piss off a vegan ghost, or awaken cravings you’re not emotionally stable enough to face.

🔥 This ain’t Martha Stewart.

This is MassacreChef.

100% meat-free… we think.

Available now at horrorinkbooks.com

👻 Get it for the gore, stay for the garlic.

🍽️ Because healing through cooking is boring.

We prefer screaming through seasoning.

With trauma, carnage, and love,

Ash & Jake

🖤 Now pass the cursed dip, bitch.